my ranting space

 I won't even lie, I give up very fast. Let me provide the background story for this topic. Some days ago, I had this sudden epiphany about starting a newsletter. It's something that'll challenge me, bring me out of my comfort zone and hone my skills. I was thinking, " This is going to be easy" Oh, how wrong I was. Creating an account on Mail Chimp was easy, but that's where it stopped. My enemies started making a mockery of me when it was time to design my sign-up form. Do you guys know how hard it is to match attractive colours? Very damn hard. Everything kept looking like visual diarrhoea, and it wasn't long before my head started banging. Shoutout to designers, it isn't easy at all. While I was facing the monkey ( Mailchimp ), I already felt like giving up. I still do, tbh. But then I asked myself, " How many things do you want to fail at? " LMAO, I'm laughing at myself as I'm writing this, but it's really true. I have this sa...

 Honestly, if your parents are the best, congrats. And clearly, this isn't the post for you. I think people misunderstand when we bash our parents. I mean, I'm not a perfect human being and I definitely suck in some ways. I can acknowledge that, so why can't I point out the same in the people responsible for my existence? I previously titled this rant parents suck but do they really suck? I snap and get cranky at the slightest inconvenience and I haven't even started taking on any major responsibilities. Imagine just trying to survive, dealing with family drama bills, etc, and having to cater to a child too? I'm not even trying to justify anything but writing it down now, I'm not even surprised at the transfer of aggression. Maybe when some of our parents look at us, they see mistakes and regret. Sucks to hear but meh. Recent dealings have also taught me that majority of parents are just overgrown babies. Poor communication and unappreciation are huge problems f...

 Idk but I naturally don't gaf about new years. I know it's an opportunity to set new goals but what's the point if you enter the new year feeling unfulfilled? I guess the average person gets this rush of hope when they see that they've crossed over to a new digit they can write on dates. But honestly, I'm just feeling very meh. I'm anxious about results, taking on more responsibilities, and the rejections that I'll inevitably experience. ( already experiencing some, in fact )  I'm still waiting for that glimmer of hope. That moment of clarity where I see great potential in this year. Where I'll feel like a mountain climber who finally got the guts to scale an intimidating mountain. But at this moment, I'm still at the couch level. Useless, unmotivated, and just eating and sleeping. I'm happy for the people whose years have already started on a good note because my constant mood these days is annoyance. I don't even have the strength to p...

The name of our book for today is Gothikana. I read this earlier in the year and I couldn't put it down. One thing that got me hooked was the descriptions, this author was precise as fuck. I felt like I was living in the book and ( perhaps ) enjoying the good stuff the MC was. I don't want to say too much about the book, but if you like good mysteries, twists and brooding ( enigmatic) males, you'd love this. The main girl-  weird, unconventional, and hears voices. Her background is also dark which I just love. And she wasn't a helpless, dumb bish that relied on the male so I loved that. Lemme just come clean, what made me really dig the book was the sexual tension and roles. Their relationship was forbidden ( student-teacher) so there was a lot of sneaking around, and excitement. The foreplay was well-paced too, her pant didn't magically open after seeing the guy. This is a dark and sexual novel and if you want roses, and happiness please just move away.  But if you...

 I feel more useless than condoms in a brothel. Now, now, I know I'm not ( possibly), but it never really matters does it?? You're trying your best to excel at something, but it never seems to work out. You know you're deserving of better things but it seems like sky daddy wants you to scramble a little more.  You've PRAYED, MANIFESTED, done everything short of sacrificing a virgin goat but stiiiiilllllll. Life just keeps fucking you with all sorts of diseases. When will it get better? When does it tho? You have 2 good days then the 5 remaining days are just a joke. I know I'm a joke but God, abeg nau. Razzpods, Sapa, intellectual decline etc.  People killing their loved ones isn't even entertaining me again, smh. But, we meuve. Things will get better ( AMEN)

 If i had written this post 2 weeks ago, I'd have probably had only good things to say but Satan ( maybe God too ) said " not yettt!!! " Like bruh can I fucking catch a break? Why do I always have to say or complain about things that should be common sense? Why could humans be so insensitive? Wtf. I've complained about this issue before and now I'll have to complain about it again? Me and my roommate probably have the best relationship ever but this her friend, MY GOD THIS HER FRIEND How will you be coming to somebody's room to read for exams? Aspa? The roommate no get exams too? How will i complain about this and she'll still be coming to read again? Well this is the part where I'm a pussy or a goat comes in. It's something I really should complain about but * inserts happy mumu song * Before I snap and randomly scream one night I'll be hopefully communicating this to my roommate. Because can I take this anymore? Not at all. My GPA is on life ...

 Up and down by doja cat literally describes this sad earth and life. Some days you’ll be feeling like you can conquer the world and then some you’ll be praying for a trailer to hit you😭. Some days I’m like ah see fine babe. Literally want to kpansh myself 7 ways to sunday, yes.😼 And the next day, my phone camera shows me that shreks ass would be a blessing compared to my face and it’s just😭. Can’t sleep, listening to music and life is seeming pretty good rn ( probably going to change soon ) so just felt like writing here. A lecturer decided it would be a good idea to give a test a week after the class and now I actually have to finish work earlier than usual lol .  Now I’m listening to what to do by Travis Scott and don toliver and I feel everyone should listen to it too because we’re all fucked up🤗. I’ll try and be posting weekly- famous last words😂.  Lucky Daye is my artist of the week🥺 karma is just beautiful. Current read is Here lies a corpse by C.L. Matthews ...